It’s football season, which is Mom’s favourite time of the year!**
* for wildcards.
Patriots – Because their management is way better than the Sawx.
Bills* – Wishcasting, certainly. But assuming the defenses are a saw-off, I like Ryan Fitzpatrick…
Jets – …more than Marktim Sancheztebow.
Dolphins – May actually pass the Jets, if things break right. Too bad they’re playing a rookie QB.
Steelers – Terrified of this season for them- old on defense, O-line still awful, Ben already hurt- but still a clear favourite.
Ravens* – Again assuming defensive equality (with the Steelers), their QB is worse.
Bengals – Some hope, but let’s see them beat a good team. Could sneak into a wildcard.
Brown – Still the Browns, thankfully.
Texans – Thought about picking them last year, didn’t have the balls. Don’t need ’em this time. To pick the Texans, I mean.
Titans – Mostly by default, I think this is a step back year under a younger QB.
Jaguars – Not sure what they’re good at any more.
Colts – They’ll need to be Luck-y to get higher. Eh? Eh?
Broncos – Assuming Peyton Manning doesn’t snap his neck. Might be an 8-8 season again.
Chargers – Getting older, not better. The Rivers will soon run dry here (BAHAHA alright no more puns)
Chiefs – Hard to know. Were they unlucky, or actually terrible last year? Probably a little of both.
Raiders – Did some necessary culling, but still employ Carson Palmer.
Giants – I don’t know.
Eagles* – Really, I have no idea.
Cowboys – I’m historically bad at picking this division.
Redskins – Feel good about this spot, despite an obvious improvement at QB.
Packers – Won’t be as lucky, but could win four fewer games and still be the class of the division.
Bears – Close last year until Cutler went down.
Lions – Will be right there with the Bears, just feel like they take a step back this year.
Vikings – Not as strong defensively as they used to be, and growing on the other side of the ball.
Falcons – Same ol’ Falcons: Win the division, quick playoff exit. See no reason for that to change.
Saints* – All signs point to “struggle”.
Buccaneers – Can’t be as bad as they were last year.
Panthers – Could be, but on an upward trajectory.
49ers – Like the Pack, won’t be nearly as lucky this year, but won’t need to be.
Seahawks – Feel like they’ll be closer to the 49ers than most think, depending on whether their offense is any good.
Cardinals – Kind of like the Jags: Not sure what they’re good at.
Rams – I remember when they were good. Been a while, huh?
** – not really.