If Dennis doesn’t have the car home before wings… well, I probably
won’t do anything, since I’ll forget about it by the next time I see
him. But I won’t be happy. Not at all.

The first work day since the quitting (which was Sunday) was
interesting, if just because of the rumors about the reasoning behind
my exit that had sprang up in my absence. My personal favourite was the
one that had me moving to Ontario with my brother to work for him. I
can’t make this crap up, people.

Other more humourous ones (such as me going to Iran to assasinate the Shah)
were, of course, exchanged over the course of the evening, but I figure
that ‘Ontario’ one just beats them all for sheer believability.

That little rumor did, on the plus side, accurately illustrate one of
my frustrations about working in such an insular environment. Though
Danny did bring up the point that I usually fly under the radar of such
things… it was only fair that I get grinded by the rumor mill on the
way out.

Saying goodbye is tough. Not necessarily to the job, but to some of the people involved, whom I will miss working with.

Super Bowl’s gonna be Colts-Panthers, I think.

Taking classes regularly (at Mount Royal, for those of you outside the
know) hasn’t been as difficult as I imagined thus far, save for my
feeling really, really old. The routine is coming back easily (save for
the near half-hour walk there, but when you think about it, I cover a
lot more than that in a typical work day), though it’s far too early to
say how I’ll fare. Of course, I wish I had gone back sooner, but the
time away has afforded some perspective, and a patience I don’t think I
had before. I’ve lost some of the urgency, even though I’m at a spot
where a lot of others seem to already be into their ‘careers’.

In the past couple of years, I’ve struggled with the idea that dropping
out of university didn’t make me a bad person, or a failure in life.
Working at Safeway, seeing others who were in similar spots, or had
already made their choice, only reminded me of that preconcieved
‘failure’. Seeing friends succeed, and do well, would occasionally
weigh on me, when I couldn’t answer, “What are YOU doing?” to my own
(or their) satisfaction.

I don’t claim to be past such insecurities and second-guessing, but I
think getting my head back into the books has helped my psyche recover
from that near-fatal blow. I have my share of regrets, but I don’t
think dropping out of programming is one of them. And I do thank God
for the experiences (and the people) he’s blessed me with in that time
away from academia.

The journey, to say the least, is far from over.

Later, folks.

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8 thoughts on “

  1. Matuga

    Twenty thousand eprops Dave, I’m so sorry I forgot to come home! Honestly thought you were working tonight, but that’s no excuse for not checking.Would love to know who makes up your rumors at work. That’s a very elaborate one.

  2. RavenJP

    Awesome man, awesome, way to stick it to the preconcived idea that if you are going nowhere in life  you come out as a failure. Life is not judged by what we achieve but by who we are, God does not do that why should we? Set a goal, plan for and then get it, gotta make it reasonable though. Hit those books kick some @!$ on the tests and get out there and do what you love. Make life the journey of joy it is meant to be.

  3. Anonymous

    It’s a good realization to come to, understanding that not living up to people’s expectation doesn’t make you a failure.  In some sense, it is the people who have failed you in expecting something that was not proper for you.  It’s a fine line to discern but it’s a line to exists.
    God bless your time at Mount Royal!

  4. miguel_senchez

    Ryan and I take responsibility for Dennis not coming back for you. We accosted him, kidnapped him and took him to chapters. Whilst there we tied him down and made him listen to what we think about just about every book in the store. Especially the ones we didn’t read. I am only kind of kidding.Mike

  5. no_wings

    Your entry made me laugh a little for several reasons. First, the rumours. I love work rumours–the grander the better. Second, I find it ironic that people think degrees equal success. What a token economy (or rather prison) attitude. Seriously, I almost have my degree in Behavioural Science complete and I’m as confused (if not more confused!) as I was in high school. The more I learn the less I know.

  6. Emmetovich

    Mike is right. It’s our fault. We did opine on a wide variety of books.
    As for how success is measured, let me tell you a story. I was near the top of my class in high school. Not THE top, mind you. Our valedictorian was the most hard working girl I think I’ve ever met. I did well in math, English, social studies, science. I also had no idea what I wanted to do after high school. The only thing I was sure of was that I didn’t want to go to university just because it was the right thing to do.I finally settled on taking a two year diploma program at SAIT. Rather than spend four years at university, I opted to spend two years at school, get a job, and then evaluate my options later. One of my high school teachers in particular was very disappointed that I wasn’t going to university. He almost took it personally, all his work in shaping me for a “successful” career was being thrown away. Even when I explained to him what I was doing, he still advised that I was making a mistake. Now, eight years after high school, I’ve got a diploma from a respected technical institute, I’ve spent four years working in the field of my studies, and I’ve begun a new career teaching the same program that I studied in. I love my job, even the stressful times. No one is qualified to measure my level of success except for myself and God. And I think we’re both in agreement that I have [mostly] followed a path that God has laid out for me.
    That being said, I sometimes feel like I have underachieved. I know I could have gone to university and gotten an engineering degree or whatever. I know it was within my ability. And sometimes I feel like I maybe took the easy road out by choosing a less strenuous area of study. I haven’t had such feelings since I started my new job at SAIT. It was mostly when I was languishing in discontent at my last job that I began feeling these things.
    Now I have the opportunity through my employer to further my education. SAIT will allow me the time and some funds to work on a master’s degree in education. This is something I’m going to work on, not because the world tells me I need a degree to be successful, but because I want to prove to myself that I can do it. I come from a family of farmers and tradespeople. No one ever told my great grandfather he was a failure because he was “just” a farmer. No one ever told my Dad he’s a failure because he’s “just” a master electrician. And even in my last job I didn’t feel I was a failure because I was “just” a draftsman. I just felt that God wasn’t done with me yet.
    I hope this helps. It is not my intention to make you feel like you’re somehow being left behind your friends and comrades, or that you haven’t achieved the same level of success as others. Society sometimes tells us that there is a cookie cutter method to being successful, that you just need to fit yourself into the mold. Well, the mold isn’t for everybody. I certainly didn’t buy into that, and I know you haven’t either.
    Good luck in your schooling this semester, and keep up the hard work.

  7. i_fly_free

    Props to Ryan for making his comments as long as a regular post lol. But I do agree with what everyone has said in commenting to you Dave.  Its been… *gasp* 5 years since ive been out of high school with no secondary education under the belt so to speak. But Im still learning from each job i hold about myself and the ppl around me and thats exactly what i want out of this mortal life on earth.  The only regret is not living 100% for God all the time and sharing his love to more people.  See you, saturday nite

  8. atomic_spirituality

    13 years out of high school, third attempt at a post-secondary education, and the only thing I can think of when people ask “What do you want to do with your life” is reply “I WANNA ROCK!!!”

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