Intelligent people loved ‘Batman Begins’. Thankfully, I count myself as one of those.

Incidentally, I have a news item to relate- an exclusive, no less. I can safely say you won’t find this anywhere else.

*****

LOCAL MAN BECOMES MEMBER OF CONSERVATIVE PARTY

LIBERALS LAMENT AT MISSED OPPURTUNITY





The Canadian political
community was abuzz today with the news that Dennis Church, a recent University
of Calgary graduate with a degree in political science, became a
card-carrying member of the Conservative Party of Canada.




Conservative leader Stephen
Harper was excited. “We are very pleased to have Mr. Church alongside
us as we fight the good fight for all Canadians,” he said. “With his
connection to the East, uncompromising ideals, and uncanny knack for
making Kraft Dinner, we can give Canadians the responsible government
that they want. I don’t think I’m exaggerating when I say he could be
the difference for us in the next election.”

Prime Minister Paul Martin tried to brush it off. “He’s one man,” he
said, waving an arm dismissively. “He can’t make a difference. So what
if he’s honest, forthright, intelligent, and might actually know how to
spend money? None of those qualities would make him an effective
Liberal.”

Our sources suggest, however, that the Liberals are reeling from the
news- and most of their caucus have started to update their resumes.
Rumor has it Belinda Stronach is already trying to find a way to switch
sides (again).  But rest assured, that sort of duplicity would
certainly not get past the Conservative’s newest member, who is as
modest as he is insightful.

When pressed for comment, Church said: “Meh. It’s a card.”

*****


Aaah, satire.

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9 thoughts on “

  1. Anonymous

    Satire is awesome, but did Dennis serious become an official Conservative party member? If so, well, he doesn’t have a blog for me to give him e-props.Count me into the group who likes Batman Begins. I watched it last week at my friend’s house (when our hiking trip didn’t happen). I missed the first 10 minutes (cause my dad was bringing my swimsuit over for the hot tub later…which didn’t happen), but I liked the rest.

  2. Emmetovich

    That is great news. Someday maybe I will follow in Dennis’ footsteps. Last night I visited the Liberal Party’s website to learn details of PM the PM’s new weekly radio address. I felt dirty afterwards and cleaned up my mind by a quick visit to the Conservative site.I have yet to see Batman Begins, so I will reserve my comment until some future date.

  3. Matuga

    We’ve got it, if you want to borrow it Ryan.I did actually make the card comment (though in retrospect, I should’ve gotten a membership that lasts longer then to the end of this calendar year). This is the greatest post ever.- Dennis

  4. mickyo

    Since you don’t have your own site, I say to Dennis: welcome aboard.  Now come the bi-monthly fundraising letters (not an exaggeration). 
    Micky

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